Classified – C.W. McCall – letras

(Bill Fries, Chip Davis)I’s thumbin’ through the want ads in the Shelby County Tribune when this classified advertisement caught my eye. It said, « Take imme-di-ate delivery on this ’57 Chevrolet half-ton pickup truck. Will sell or swap for a hide-a-bed and thirty-five bucks. Call One-four-oh, ring two, and ask for Bob. »Well, I called Bob up on the telephone, he says, « Hello, this is Bob speakin’. » I says « This here the Bob got the pickup truck for sale? » He says, « Yeah. » I says, « Where are ya? » He says, « Fourteen east on County 12, turn right on the one-lane gravel road, you can park in the yard, beware of the dog, wipe your feet off, knock three times, and bring your billfold. »Well, I tooled on east on County 12, turned right on the one-lane gravel road, and I parked in the yard and a German shepherd come out and grabbed onto my leg. Then I knocked three times and wiped my feet, the dog let go and the screen door opened and Bob come out and says « Whaddya want? » I says, « Come to see your truck. » He says, « Follow me. Come on, Frank. » (Dog’s name is Frank.)Well, we all went past the chicken house, through the hog pen, down to the tractor shed, and then wound up in back of the barn in a field of cowpies. And settin’ right there in a pool of grease was a half-ton Chevy pickup truck with a 1960 license plate, a bumper sticker says « Vote for Dick » and Brillo box full of rusty parts, and Bob says « Whaddya think? ».Well, I kicked the tires and I got in the seat and set on a petrified apple core and found a bunch of field mice livin’ in the glove compartment. He says, « Her shaft is bent and her rear end leaks, you can fix her quick with an oily rag. Use a nail as a starter; I lost the key. Don’t pay no mind to that whirrin’ sound. She use a little oil, but outside a’ that, she’s cherry. »I says, « What’ll take? » He says, « What’ve you got? » I says, « Twenty-eight dollars and fifteen cents. » He says, « You got a deal. Sign here, I’ll go get the title and a can full of gas. » I put the nail in the slot and fired ‘er up; she coughed and belched up a bunch a’ smoke and I backed her right through the hog pen into the yard.Well, Frank jumped in and bit my leg and I beat him off with a crowbar. He jumped on out and the door fell off and the left front tire went flat. I jacked it up and patched the tube and Frank tore a piece of my shirt off. Then Bob come out and called him off and says « You better’d get on out of here. »I went left on the one-lane gravel road, went fourteen west on County 12. Took two full quarts of forty-weight oil just to get her to the Conoco station. And I pulled up to the Regular pump and then Harold Sykes and his kid come out. He says, « I’ve seen better stuff at junkyards and where’d you ever get that truck? »I says, « That’s a long story, Harold. I’s thumbin’ through the want ads in the Shelby County Tribune when this classified advertisement caught my eye. It said, « Take imme-di-ate delivery on this ’57 Chevrolet half-ton pickup truck. Will sell or swap for a hide-a-bed and thirty-five bucks… »