(Bill Fries, Chip Davis)We is screamin’ through the valleyWhere the Nishnabotna flowsThrough the mud and crud and cornfieldsWhere the mari-ju-wana grows’Cross the railroad tracks of PersiaDown the hills and up the daleHad a CJ-5 with a four-wheel driveAnd Smokey on my tail.Well, he picked me up at exit 12On the I-six-eighty rampI was doin’ 67 perWhen I rumbled through his trapHe commenced to whirl his flashin’ lightsAnd he made his siren wailI slipped on down to four-wheel driveWith Smokey on my tailNow I got racin’ stripes and dual pipesAnd Smokey’s got a FordGot a mill with a four pot carb, you knowBut Smokey’s stroked and boredWell, the chase was on, but I had the edgeWith a rig that’ll never failGot a CJ-5 with a four-wheel driveAnd Smokey on my tailYeah, he was.Well, I dropped on down to granny lowAnd I made a hard right turnMy big ol’ fat Commando tiresWent slashin’ through the cornWell, the tassels blewAnd the kernels flewAnd it looked like yella hailJust cookin’ alive in a four-wheel driveWith Smokey on my tailWell, we went screamin’ through the valleyWhere the Nishnabotna flowsThrough the mud and crud and cornfieldsWhere the mari-ju-wana grows’Cross the railroad tracks of PersiaUp the hills and down the dalesMy CJ-5 with four-wheel driveAnd Smokey on my tail.[Imagine a series of comic-style thought balloons.]Look out, now. Here he come.Oh, we gonna get it on now.(Don’t hit that fella with the banjo.)We gonna swim this here creek now, Smokey. [Pronounced « crick », of course.]Yard wide and a foot deep. »Nishnabota River », they call it.Might haveta winch out.Gonna do a wheelie on that there gopher mound now, Smokey.Can you dig it, Smokey?Got four on the floor and four in the air on that one, didn’t we?Goodness gracious. ‘Bout ta bust my shocks.[Back to our regularly-scheduled rhyming. Add the sound of wailing sirens.]Well, that Jeep of mine made Smokey whineHis rig was made of leadHe was mired in fourteen feet of mudSo he radioed aheadI pulled up onto the blacktopWent crashin’ on through the railSakes alive! I had twenty-five moreSmokeys on my tail!Now I had racin’ stripes and dual pipesAnd Smokey had a FordHad a mill with a four pot carb, you knowBut Smokey’s stroked and boredWell, the race was on, but I had the edgeWith a rig that’ll never failGot a CJ-5 with a four-wheel driveSettin’ out back a’ the jail